[2010-01-03] (V)** Holland



Skype with Bhagavan in Wageningen, Holland 3 january 2010.

Question 1:
Dear Bhagavan my husband insults me and I want to experience the pain, but instead I insult him even more. I'm afraid the behavior in this anger will come back to me manifold. How do I receive Grace to experience the pain instead of reacting violently? You told my husband and me we should respect each other and that it is up to us. But it is getting worse.. it seems impossible. I act violently Bhagavan. Please bless us. And Bhagavan to be honest I don't want to change. Something in me doesn't want to give up the fight with him. Why do I want this instead of happiness?


Question 2:
I do the 10/20 minute Sadhana's on a regular basis. But somehow it looks like the growth has slowed down (or I notice it less then before). Do you have any suggestions on how to keep growing and noticing it? I heard something in another skype session about a 49 minute practice for everyday.
Can you tell about that, should we do another practice?


Question 3:
When I give blessings I have sometimes very strange physical reactions. Lately my heartbeat turns up enormously and that scares me. Also feel so much heat that I sometimes have to go outside to cool down a bit. Is this dangerous, should I do anything about it? There are other blessinggivers who
have other big physical reactions when they give blessings. Should they just continue to give blessings? Can it be harmful? What can they do?


Question 4:
When I listen to the news and hear about the klimate changes, the financial crisis, about the wars in the world, I sometimes get very scared. I feel like not wanting to now all the details of the drama in the world, because they make me feel so sad and helpless. Can you tell something about how we should deal with this? Is it good to follow the news carefully, although it makes me worried? Should I do anything with my worries? Or can I deal with it in an other constructive way?